The Religion of the Wet Towel

Ife J. Ibitayo

“I recommend having fun because there is nothing better for people in this world than to eat, drink, and enjoy life.” Where is this quote from? Good Morning America? A famous actor like Ryan Reynolds or Adam Sandler? You might be surprised to learn that this is a verse in the Bible.

Which begs the question, why is this so surprising? How was Christianity rebranded as the Religion of the Wet Towel? When did the faith that is supposed to bring “abundant life” become such a killjoy?

The Origin of the Wet Towel

It didn’t start with Jesus. In the book of Luke, Jesus described the words of His naysayers in this way: “The Son of Man feasts and drinks and you say, ‘He’s a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners’” (Luke 7:34). Jesus spent so much time partying and enjoying Himself that the religious establishment thought He should have less fun, not more. Time and time again, Jesus railed against the stodgy buzzkills of His day because they deprived people of the joy God had called for them to obtain. Yet, over the course of time, Jesus’ church has come to be known for the opposite. In its pursuit of holiness, many in the church have lost happiness along the way.

The Consequences of the Wet Towel

Too often, Christianity is portrayed as a religion of “don’ts.” Don’t curse, don’t drink, don’t sleep around. No more partying, gambling, or fun for you. Then, there’s all the stuff you need to do instead like giving up 10% of your hard-earned income. Do all the right things and don’t do all the wrong things, then you will be accepted into God’s family.

I was once part of a Christian organization that embodied this rigid, rule-based system. If we weren’t serving, we were evangelizing. If we weren’t evangelizing, we were studying the Bible. If we weren’t studying the Bible, we were hanging out together—by force. And if I ever missed a church event, woe to me for having chosen the movies over Jesus. I nearly suffered a nervous breakdown trying to do everything right at all times in every way, and I definitely was not having much fun. But Christianity was never supposed to be this way.

The book of Colossians says, “’Do not handle! Do not taste! Do not touch!’ Such regulations indeed have an appearance of wisdom, with their self-imposed worship, their false humility, and their harsh treatment of the body, but they lack any value in restraining sensual indulgence” (Colossians 2:21-23). This means the true Christian faith is not about restriction but freedom, relationship rather than regulation. Otherwise, Christianity simply becomes another ladder we climb up to prove yet again that we’re worthy.

The Alternative to the Wet Towel

Our society tries to present us with a false dichotomy: be holy and miserable or happy and sinful. But the way of Christ is both happy and holy. It involves self-sacrifice, but it also entails appreciating the bounty God has blessed us with, living at a different pace than the hamster wheel of our culture, and enjoying time with our friends and family. If we’re not experiencing both, that isn’t Christianity.

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. [Jesus] came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”

John 10:10