Living in the Present (Time & Timing Pt. 1)

By Ife J. Ibitayo

“Live in the moment” is the anti-mantra of my life. I always find myself stuck in the past or pining for the future. I had a great childhood, and I have great hope for the future (Jeremiah 29:11; 1 Corinthians 2:9). But the problem has always been the time in between.

Today, I have to wrestle with the pressures of work, the expectations of other people, and the daily grind of the mundane. March 6th isn’t my birthday. It isn’t Christmas. It is just like every other day. And the presence of COVID has only heightened the banality of my current existence. Solomon spoke well when he said, “Everything is wearisome beyond description. No matter how much we see, we are never satisfied. No matter how much we hear, we are not content. History merely repeats itself. It has all been done before. Nothing under the sun is truly new” (Ecclesiastes 1:8-9 NLT).

Why not Live In the Past?

During seasons like this, I am especially tempted to sink into the past. I want to spend my days reminiscing about the years I enjoyed hanging out with friends and family. I want to dream about game nights and weekend getaways, vacations and get togethers. The list goes on and on, and the more I think about it, the more depressed I become.

Solomon went on to say, Don’t long for ‘the good old days.’ This is not wise” (Ecclesiastes 7:10 NLT). But why? If I cannot find satisfaction in today, why not find it vicariously through yesterdays gone by? This is what Joni Eareckson Tada did when she was paralyzed from the chest down. She spent her days escaping into the past. She found solace in remembering the times when she used to swim in clear lakes and whip over the ground on horseback. But we all know that “wonderland” can never truly satisfy. Living in the past can only leave us frustrated in the present.

Why not Live in the Future?

If we can’t escape into the past, how about the future? Tomorrow, COVID will be eradicated and our lives will be restored. But the problem with tomorrow is that that day keeps on moving. Life was supposed to return to normal last spring, then last summer, then no later than winter. We were months out from the end of this global pandemic back in March of last year, and we’re still months out.

When we pin our hopes on an uncertain future, our happiness is guaranteed to be uncertain. But God commands us to “rejoice in the Lord always” (Philippians 4:4a NIV). Some people reduce this command to the salvation of Christ, saying that our unhappiness stems from focusing on temporal, physical things when our focus should be on eternal, spiritual things (Colossians 3:2).

There is some truth in this line of reasoning. But the God who created the physical world and called it good never changed His mind (Genesis 1:31). Even when times are tough, good still abounds. I found myself close to tears last week as I reflected on my close friends who have stuck with me all these years. I’ve basked in the beauty of God’s great outdoors even in the middle of winter, and I’ve relished the evenings I’ve been able to spend getting lost in a good TV show or video game.

Conclusion

The past is gone. The future is uncertain. And the present is challenging. But “God is good all the time. And all the time God is good.” Sometimes we just have to look a little harder to rediscover this truth than others.

“This is the day that the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.”

(Psalm 118:24 ESV)

Friendship or “Friendship” (Love Is… Part 4)

By Ife J. Ibitayo

For Part 1, “Love Is Patient”, click here; Part 2, “Love is Kind”, click here; Part 3, “The Love of the LORD”, click here.

Love–Think of holding hands with your significant other while strolling down lamplit boulevards with a majestic symphonic backdrop. But as stirring as this image is, it’s limited. Deep love comes in a variety of packages, including that between friends. In spite of cupids lurking around every corner during this month of February, I think this is a prime opportunity to study an example of brotherly love found in the Bible.

Friendship

King David’s closest friend was the son of his sworn archenemy, King Saul. His name was Jonathan, and he was the heir apparent to his father’s throne. Yet he did everything possible to ensure his best friend would become king.

King Saul himself said about Jonathan, “‘You son of a perverse and rebellious woman! Don’t I know that you have sided with the son of Jesse to your own shame and to the shame of the mother who bore you? As long as the son of Jesse lives on this earth, neither you nor your kingdom will be established’” (1 Samuel 20:30-31 NIV).

Jonathan did not act against his own best interests because he had a death wish, nor was it because he despised his father. In fact, he was one of his father’s best warriors and died by his side (2 Samuel 1:23). He acted this way because he was a good friend. And he loved David more than he loved himself (1 Samuel 18:1).

“Friendship”

Our culture has morphed friendship to such a degree that this kind of commitment seems strange. “Friends with benefits” is a term used to describe platonic relationships with the “benefit” of sex, but that term accurately describes the kind of “friendships” that abound in society today.

A “friend” is someone who provides access to career advancement or elite cliques. A “friend” is someone who strokes your ego and makes you feel good about yourself. A “friend” is someone who enhances the pool of money, time, and energy you can draw from to accomplish your end goals. And like the dew that flees from the rising sun, their love will vanish at the first sign of heat.

The Difference

With that definition of “friendship” in mind, no wonder so many people devalue it as a stump on the road to marriage and children. But Jesus said, “There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends” (John 15:13 NLT). He spoke of friendship because the deepness of that relationship should demand sacrifice, not avoid it.

Jonathan wept when he and his best friend parted ways (1 Samuel 20:41-42). He risked his life to speak much needed words of encouragement to David when he was struggling to survive (1 Samuel 23:15-17). And they made promises to each other that outlived the grave (2 Samuel 21:7).

Conclusion

True friendship is as beautiful as it is rare. Just as a miner would have a hard time believing coal is made of the same stuff as precious gemstones, so we have a diminished view of friendship because of the kind of “friends” this world so often offers us. But just like diamonds in the rough, even though friendship may be tough to find, it’s still well worth the search.

“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.”

(Proverbs 17:17 NIV)

Precious Junk and Swift Riches

By Ife J. Ibitayo

My short story “Precious Junk and Swift Riches” has been published in issue #4 of tdotSpec’s Speculative North Magazine. I wrote this story to discuss the question: “Can life really go too fast?” A fast-paced life is not free. It’s an exchange many of us make, yet we all too often don’t consider the cost:

The kindle version of this issue is free for the next five days!

Story Excerpt

Time seemed to slow as I jerked the steering wheel to the left, stomped on the brakes, and adjusted my magnetic balancing. Lucky Larry 2 cartwheeled to the side, and I stepped on the gas, more tentatively this time. An opponent veered in front of me. I tried to maneuver around them, but they kept blocking my path.

A section of track in front of us dropped away. I pulsed my magnets and leapt over the gap but right where I was going to land, another wall materialized. The hovercraft in front of me was going to crash into it anyway, but I still mouthed “Sorry,” as I angled my hovercraft upward and pulsed my magnets off their roof. I leapfrogged over the hovercraft and smashed it into the ground in the process.

I was in second place as I looped around a large semicircular curve. As I neared the racer in first, I took the inside corner to inch ahead of them. I glanced to the left and saw the bottom of their hovercraft. Its powerful electromagnets were pointed at my mirror.

“As if!” I said, and as they activated his electromagnets, I rolled toward then and activated mine. I barely rocked in place, but the extra force of my magnets sent them flying off the course.

As I drove down the final straightaway, I relaxed and breathed a sigh of relief. I lifted my hand to wipe sweat from my brow, but the track under me abruptly tilted like a seesaw. Because the rest of the track in front of me was level, the abrupt change in orientation flung my hovercraft onto its side.

In the millisecond I had to react, I tried to right the hovercraft with my hand that was still clutching the steering wheel, but it wasn’t enough. The hovercraft continued rolling, and I closed my eyes as the track rushed up to meet me. The roof crunched as it caved in, and I screamed as my hovercraft slid upside down across the track.

The Love of the LORD (Love Is… Part 3)

By Ife J. Ibitayo

For Part 1, “Love is Patient”, click here. For Part 2, “Love is Kind”, click here.

I hate my name. Let me explain why before my mom dials me with a very angry phone call. My full name is Ifeoluwa, meaning the “Love of the LORD.” In Nigerian culture, names carry weight. They describe who you are called to be from cradle to grave. And through my few decades of living, I can already see how short I fall of my own.

Loving Through Rebuffing

December 25, 2015 was my first opportunity to play a Christmas playlist I curated for my family. At 7 AM, I began blasting the great classics like “What Christmas Means to Me” and “I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas.” If you don’t recognize those songs, don’t worry, neither did my family. And they gently asked me to put on some more traditional Christmas tracks.

I grated at their lack of appreciation and dragged my little brother downstairs, certain he’d value my awesome musical selections. Being slightly more interested in his Christmas presents, he didn’t, and I shoved him. I hadn’t ever laid hands on my little brother like that, and for me to attack for him something so trivial shook me.

Speaking of the Israelites as the little children in His life, God said through the prophet Hosea, “‘When Israel was a child, I loved him, and out of Egypt I called My son. But the more they were called, the more they went away from Me. They sacrificed to the Baals, and they burned incense to images. It was I who taught Ephraim to walk, taking them by the arms; but they did not realize it was I who healed them” (Hosea 11:1-13 NIV).

God’s own children abandoned Him. They turned their backs on Him and spurned His loving care. They took His blessings but rejected His instruction. Yet His faithful love for them never wavered. He healed them graciously, deferred His wrath mercifully, and disciplined them justly. He was never fickle or petty. In other words, He wasn’t like me.

Loving Through Suffering

My college experience encompassed the most trying years of my life. I spoke of the loneliness I endured during that season in a previous article. But that was only a small drop in the toxic brew that made my experience so bitter. A large source of my pain stemmed from my relationship with a professor I studied under.

My first year with him, he was distant. I could count the number of times I had a private conversation with him on one hand. The next, he was too close for comfort. He’d reach out at all manner of day and night, demanding results and pushing expectations. His moods whipped with the wind, from sunny and jovial one day to stormy and irritable the next. The pressure of his demands drove me to my very breaking point, and his hurtful words stabbed deep into my soul.

Nearing graduation, I vowed to forgive him for everything he’d done, but I always remained on edge in his presence. And after I graduated, every time I thought of him, the old pain would resurface, and I’d have to turn my thoughts to other things.

Yet Jesus begged His Father while being murdered on the cross, “‘Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing’” (Luke 23:24 NIV). The God of love was able to forgive those who only took from Him, while I struggled to forgive a man who contributed to where I am today.

Conclusion

I am not Ifeoluwa. I am not the “Love of the LORD.” I am not Jesus. But my saving grace is that Jesus is Jesus. He loved me even when I hated Him. He will continue to teach me how to be more like my Father because He’s made me His son. And through His work on the inside of me, I’ll bear a little more resemblance to the tremendous name I’ve been given.

“This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.”

(1 John 4:10 NIV)

Love is Kind (Love Is… Part 2)

By Ife J. Ibitayo

For Part 1, Love is Patient, click here.

I still remember the day I found out that I was going to have a little brother. I jubilated for days while the rest of my family groaned (after having two sons, they were really hoping for a daughter). I counted the days till I’d have a mini-me to teach the glorious wonders of basketball, video games, and the Word. Then he was born.

I quickly found out that having a younger sibling was far less about instructing him to come up to my level and far more about coming down to his. I forced goofy grins as I hefted his chubby little body into the air for the hundredth time. I bit my tongue as we watched reruns of Peppa Pig when I’d much rather be enjoying a new season of The Simpsons. In short, I learned the sacrificial, giving nature of love.

Love Is

1 Corinthians 13:4 says, “Love is kind.” The Greek word translated “kind” is “chrésteuomai”, meaning “to be full of service to others”. Love is far more than a feeling of goodwill toward another. It is an inward emotion that leads to outward action. That is why Jesus said, “There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends” (John 15:13 NLT).

Just as faith without works is dead (James 2:17), so is love without kindness. Apostle James said, “Suppose you see a brother or sister who has no food or clothing, and you say, ‘Good-bye and have a good day; stay warm and eat well’—but then you don’t give that person any food or clothing. What good does that do” (James 2:15-16 NLT)? Love is more than flowery sentiment and good vibrations (1 John 3:18). It’s sacrificing one’s time, energy, and money for the good of another.

Love Isn’t

Kindness encompasses what we refrain from doing as well. “Love does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged” (1 Corinthians 13:5 NLT).

Firstly, love doesn’t demand its own way. It permits the other to choose—the restaurant, the movie, the vacation getaway—even when its well within one’s right to unilaterally make the decision. In doing so, we humbly value others over ourselves (Philippians 2:3).

 Secondly, love isn’t irritable. As we discussed last week, love is patient (1 Corinthians 13:4). It puts up with the sticky hands and screaming voices, the carpet stains and broken dishes, the gaming at 3 AM and the napping at 3 PM.

Lastly, love isn’t vindictive. Just as God flung our sins as far away from us as the east is from the west (Psalm 103:12), so we must forgive one another’s faults. No longer should we see them as Lying Laurie or Lazy Lucas. We must see them with the eyes of Christ—as new creations (2 Corinthians 5:17).

Conclusion

 After hearing about how much love demands, it could be easy to try replace it with a cheap substitute. But just as any true Coke lover knows that aspartame is a poor replacement for sugar, real love can never be exchanged. We must love because we’re made in the image of the God of love (Genesis 1:27). And love is kind.

“We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love. God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them.”

(1 John 4:16)

Love is Patient (Love Is… Part 1)

By Ife J. Ibitayo

As we slide into the month of February, I think it is an especially relevant time to consider love. What is love? What isn’t it? These are the questions I’ll be considering as we dive into 1 Corinthians 13.

When the Apostle Paul began to describe the characteristics of love, the first one he listed was “Love is patient” (1 Corinthians NIV). I believe this choice was very intentional and is an essential attribute of love.

Love or Lust

“An intense yearning for another.” Does this definition describe love or lust? Love is a powerful emotion. The Song of Solomon says that “love is as strong as death, its jealousy as unyielding as the grave” (Song of Solomon 8:6 NIV). But once again, this description could be applied just as accurately to lust. However, when lust is forced to wait, it will exact its vengeance on the object of its affection.

Consider Amnon, son of King David. He had a gorgeous, virgin half-sister named Tamar. His feelings ran so deep that he was depressed morning after morning (2 Samuel 13:4). The NKJV even says that he was losing weight over his lovesickness! After an eternity of waiting, Amnon tricked his half-sister into coming into his bedroom alone, and he raped her (2 Samuel 13:14).

When Amnon finally acquired the focus of his desire, he took out all his agonizing months of waiting upon her. Then he kicked her to the curb and went on with his life (2 Samuel 13:15-19). Amnon’s emotions were clearly lust because of the damage they wreaked upon the one he wanted.

Love, on the other hand, is longsuffering. 1 Corinthians 13 goes on to say that “love doesn’t insist on its own way”. Rather it “bears all things” and “endures all things” (1 Corinthians 13:5, 7 ESV). True love takes that debt of pain that accrues while waiting and absorbs it.

Love or Wrath

In a letter to his dearly beloved son in the faith Timothy, Apostle Paul said, “This is a trustworthy saying, and everyone should accept it: ‘Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners’—and I am the worst of them all. But God had mercy on me so that Christ Jesus could use me as a prime example of his great patience with even the worst sinners. Then others will realize that they, too, can believe in him and receive eternal life” (1 Timothy 1:15-16 NLT).

Apostle Paul truly was one of the worst sinners who has ever walked this earth. He was a notorious terrorist, going door to door and dragging off believers to prison and their deaths (Acts 26:10)! He presided over their murders in broad daylight (Acts 7:57-8:1) and extended his zeal even beyond the borders of his own country (Acts 9:1-2)! But the Brother and Father of the men and women Paul destroyed waited patiently for him to see the light. They suffered long his raging persecution. And when they finally won his heart, they didn’t destroy him. Jesus welcomed this terrorist as His brother, and the Father invited this murderer into His household as His son (Romans 8:16-17).

God never exacted vengeance on Paul. Instead, He absorbed the wrath Paul deserved for his sins, and the wrath we deserve for our own, and poured it out on His beloved Son. That, that is love.

Conclusion

Love is patient. I am convinced that very few of us naturally possess this gift of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22), and none of us possess it in the measure we should. But we can start afresh today. Instead of lashing out, we can embrace. Instead of coercing more, we can demand less. And we can take the agonizing debt of pain that’s accruing and give it to God.

“Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.”

(Ephesians 4:2 NLT)

A United Faith or a Divided House

By Ife J. Ibitayo

In Jesus’ final prayer for His disciples, the son of God says, “I have given them the glory that You gave Me, that they may be one as We are one—I in them and You in Me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that You sent Me and have loved them even as You have loved Me” (John 17:22-23 NIV). The world is meant to believe Jesus is God’s Son through the unity of His church.

Yet we live in a time where the church is more divided than ever. Recent events have sent a deep fissure into the bedrock of the American church. The tremors have revealed its shaky foundation and raised some critical questions: What is the church? And why is it still important?

What is the Church?

The church consists of all those on earth who believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God. But it’s also far more than this. It’s the vehicle that spreads the good news of Jesus Christ to the nations (Matthew 28:19-20). It is a charitable organization that extends God’s mission of healing the broken and helping the disenfranchised (James 1:27). And it is also the visible manifestation of Jesus Christ living and acting in the world today (Ephesians 1:22-23).

Something I’ve discovered through rereading the gospels is how much the Son and the Father love one another. The Father’s first public words to Jesus Christ were “‘This is My beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased’” (Matthew 3:17 ESV). Every other time the Father speaks in the gospels, He affirms His beloved Son (Luke 9:35; John 12:28). The Father and the Son never bickered. They were never irritated with one another. They never gave up on each other. They perfectly manifested the love the church is supposed to (1 Corinthians 13:4-7).

Why is the Church Still Important?

At the start of His ministry, Jesus quoted His God-given mission from the Old Testament: “The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed Me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent Me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners” (Isaiah 61:1 NIV). And this mission is supposed to be carried on by His church today. The world is filled with more poor, broken people now than we’ve seen in a very long time. They need good news, freedom, and light. But how are we supposed to share good news with others when we’re constantly bad-talking each other? How are we supposed to bind up the brokenhearted when we’re tearing down our brothers?

Conclusion

One hundred fifty years ago, Abraham Lincoln said, “A house divided against itself cannot stand”. Seven years later he stood amongst the smoking ashes of a nation that learned that lesson the hard way. If the American church is to survive, we must be unified.

“I appeal to you, brothers and sisters, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another in what you say and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly united in mind and thought.”

(1 Corinthians 1:10 NIV)

An Apostle’s Farewell (Power of Legacy Pt. 3)

By Ife J. Ibitayo

For Part 1, “Like Father, Like Son”, click here. For Part 2, “Actions Speak Louder than Proverbs”, click here.

Final addresses carry a power few other speeches can. They answer the question, “If I never get the chance to see you again, what must I tell you?”

Vulnerability

In his final message to the leaders of the Ephesian church, Apostle Paul began, “’You know how I lived the whole time I was with you, from the first day I came into the province of Asia. I served the Lord with great humility and with tears and in the midst of severe testing by the plots of my Jewish opponents’” (Acts 20:18-19 NIV).

Firstly, Paul was vulnerable. His courageous leadership was unquestionable. He fought wild animals (1 Corinthians 15:32), braved shipwreck, and suffered beatings (2 Corinthians 11:25). Yet he also wasn’t afraid to put his heart on the line. He loved the members of the Christ’s body as his sons (1 Timothy 1:2), brothers (Philippians 1:12), and mothers (Romans 16:13), and he taught his followers to do the same.

Integrity

Then Paul went on to say, “‘And now, compelled by the Spirit, I am going to Jerusalem, not knowing what will happen to me there. I only know that in every city the Holy Spirit warns me that prison and hardships are facing me. However, I consider my life worth nothing to me; my only aim is to finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the good news of God’s grace’” (Acts 20:22-24 NIV).

Paul is one of the few leaders in history who has lived in a manner worthy of his preaching. Jesus commanded that all who call themselves Christians should “deny themselves, take up their cross, and follow Him” (Matthew 16:24). The cross was an instrument of suffering and death, and Paul willingly accepted both in order to adorn the message he preached.

Industry

Paul concluded, “‘I have not coveted anyone’s silver or gold or clothing. You yourselves know that these hands of mine have supplied my own needs and the needs of my companions. In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: “It is more blessed to give than to receive”’” (Acts 20:33-35 NIV).

All of us possess God-given visions on our lives. Very few of us realize them because we are not willing to put in the excruciating amount of hard work needed to achieve them. But Paul worked harder than any other apostle (1 Corinthians 5:10) ensuring that his message was above reproach.

Conclusion

When Apostle Paul finished his speech, “They all wept as they embraced him and kissed him. What grieved them most was his statement that they would never see his face again” (Acts 20:37-38a). When some leaders leave their office, their followers rejoice, but for others they weep bitterly. The difference is the legacy they leave behind. Apostle Paul left an incomparable legacy because of his open heart and calloused hands, and we have the opportunity to do the same.

“As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received.”

(Ephesians 4:1 NIV)

Actions Speak Louder than Proverbs (Power of Legacy Pt. 2)

By Ife J. Ibitayo

As I said in Part 1, “Like Father, Like Son”, King David was a truly epic king. He was one of the greatest leaders the world has ever known, but he also committed one of the gravest sins recorded in the Bible. He slept with the wife of one of his most valiant warriors. Then he murdered the man, so he could make the woman his own (2 Samuel 11). These acts plummeted the last years of King David’s life into familial catastrophe containing incest (2 Samuel 13:1-14) and the death of three of his sons (2 Samuel 12:15-18; 2 Samuel 13:23-29; 2 Samuel 14-17:18) .

Lessons Learned

King David regretted these sins for the rest of his life, and he taught his son Solomon not to follow in his footsteps. The beginning of the book of Proverbs—chapters 1 to 9—is the wisdom Solomon gained from his father. King Solomon dedicated nearly 75 verses to the warnings his father gave him about women alone (Proverbs 2:16-19; 5:1-23; 6:20-35; 7:1-27). Words such as, “The lips of an immoral woman are as sweet as honey, and her mouth is smoother than oil. But in the end she is as bitter as poison, as dangerous as a double-edged sword” (Proverbs 5:3-4 NLT) must have been seared into Solomon’s soul by the time he became king.

And Solomon was an amazing king. He established the Israeli-equivalent of the Pax Romana, forty years of uninterrupted commercial success, martial stability, and technological advancement (1 Kings 10:14-29). He brokered piece with Egypt (1 Kings 3:1) and Ethiopia (1 Kings 10:1-13). And he was the wisest men who ever lived (1 Kings 4:29-31).

Lessons Spurned

Yet Solomon too had a demon he couldn’t slay: his insatiable appetite for the ladies. He married 1,000 women (1 Kings 11:3)! To put that into perspective, he could sleep with a different beautiful lady each night for nearly three years without coming to the same woman again!

Many commentaries mention that politics motivated these marriage alliances. But these alliances caused Solomon to not only make peace with these foreign nations but also with their foreign gods. “So Solomon did evil in the eyes of the Lord; he did not follow the Lord completely, as David his father had done. On a hill east of Jerusalem, Solomon built a high place for Chemosh the detestable god of Moab, and for Molek the detestable god of the Ammonites. He did the same for all his foreign wives, who burned incense and offered sacrifices to their gods” (1 Kings 11:6-8 NIV).

As punishment for his lustful passion, the LORD raised up several powerful adversaries against Solomon (1 Kings 11:14-40). And his heir, King Rehaboam, lost control of most of the Israelite empire (1 Kings 11:11-13).

Conclusion

King Solomon heard all the words his father said about chasing after women, but as the old adage goes, actions speak louder than proverbs. He emulated the iniquity his father committed rather than the wise words he preached. Just as Solomon’s success was catalyzed by his father, so was his failure.

“You, then, who teach others, do you not teach yourself? You who preach against stealing, do you steal? You who say that people should not commit adultery, do you commit adultery? You who abhor idols, do you rob temples?”

(Romans 2:21-22 NIV)

Untraditional

By Ife J. Ibitayo

My short story “Untraditional” has been published in issue #81 of Andromeda Spaceways Magazine. This is my first accepted publication. This is a story about identity and in some ways deals with how I’ve struggled with my own:

ASM #81

Story Excerpt

“Just play whatever,” C. Lynxis said. T. Kes plugged his ears with his fingers and winked. Michael plucked a few random notes. Then, a song his mother used to play came to him. It had been years since he had heard that song, but the notes came easily. As he began to pluck the lullaby, his blue wing began to twitch, producing a beautiful accompaniment. He almost stopped playing in surprise, but he managed to keep on going. The song took him back to the days when his mother used to hold him, cradling him in her arms, looking down in his face and cooing.

The memory was sweet, and he didn’t want it to end. But, after a few more minutes, he reached the dying note. He opened his eyes, not even realizing he had closed them. He wiped away the wetness from his cheeks.

C. Lynxis looked at T. Kes, who looked back at her, and they both looked back at Michael. The silence stretched for at least a minute or two before T. Kes said, “That was okay” just as C. Lynxis said, “You were amazing.” C. Lynxis glared at T. Kes and said, “I think what he meant to say was that was beautiful.”

He glared back at C. Lynxis and said, “I know what I said, and I meant it,” T. Kes got up and stomped into his bedroom, slamming the door.

Michael stared at his palms, not sure what to think. He felt a soft presence on his shoulders, warm and soothing. He looked up and saw C. Lynxis’ purple wings. She was smiling down at him, sadness in her eyes. “He’s been through a lot. He’ll come around.” She also went into the bedroom and closed the door.